Touch with prudence to communicate effectively

A warm handshake

Modern hurry and the aftermath of the pandemic have impacts on the physical proximity between people. Mostly the communications are done over the internet or the mobile. Still the wise touch of an individual makes all the difference to our well-being and happiness. Through the different gestures of touch that exude warmth, not only do we feel better but are impacted from within.

Image Source: – A handshake that tells of compassion

A reading of the book “Body Language : Your Success Mantra” by Prof. (Dr) Shalini Verma makes one understand that a gesture is best expressed when we compliment it with our deep feelings arousing out of inner joy and acceptance. The person on the other side is well guided by instinct and intuition to read between the messages. Take for example the handshake. It comes best when we mentally treat the other person as equal and want to express our sincere feelings for him or her. The more compassionate we are from within, and free of bias or any ill feeling, the better and effective becomes our communication through the handshake.

The same basics as above apply for every gesture of ours. A hug for example happens best when we want to convey our inner happiness and joy in meeting the person whom we are embracing. It is not always how best or conventional you make your gestures that matters. Through whatever gesture we want to communicate, it is the sincerity and truth of feelings that make our communication more effective.

Image Source: – A Warm Hug

Let me cite different examples. The concerned parents may try to convey their concern and restrict their children from doing something not acceptable by putting on them a tight slap. Initially this may make the child uncomfortable. But according to psychologists the child learns to decipher the concern of the parent and becomes disciplined. This touch makes him to obey the authority and prepares him better to face the harsh world in the later life. On the contrary, the kid who has never had a slap in life is less able to bear the pains in later life. He or she is unable to face the lessons with which life will temper him or her. Relating to personal experiences, I feel myself blessed in a way that once in my lifetime I got the taste of such a hard slap from my father who is no more. I still feel the pinch that the disciplinarian Dad wanted to make me feel whenever I am tempted to go against my conscience. It is a communication process that works as a guidance through life.

Image Source: – A Slap From A Dad

Sometimes the gestures which are made to discipline can come as a form of appreciation too. It becomes more coveted memories that inspire. At the start of my career, I used to work at an organization which is a renowned Indian MNC by now. Our chairman was Mr. Madan Mohanka who had been praised in the “Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish” book. He gave me a bit difficult HR task and I completed it well beyond the expectations that one had of my level at that time. While I was working at my desk, I felt someone from behind pulling my left ear. Then came a quick question “Which monkey has prepared this chart?” I muttered, “Me Sir”. The fatherly gentleman is a people-builder still. He knew how to encourage. He said, “It is an excellent work and from now on you will take charge of computing such calculations for the group company without any guidance”. This gesture from such an eminent personality not only increased my confidence but also gave me the clarion call to be more dedicated at my efforts. In fact, a prudent touch which comes from the heart can create wonders in any life.


Once I went to the State ESI hospital to treat my mother. A gentleman came with heart ailments. Visibly he was panting and while we were standing in que to be treated, we heard him relating his pains to the doctor. The doctor who was a middle-aged spectacled person without the show of his warm heart, that he carried inside, listened with rapt attention. Before scribbling on his pad, the prescription, I saw him patting on the back of the patient and stroking his palms in a smooth manner at his back for quite some time. Then he told gently “Keep relaxed” and get better soon.

At such a tender age, I was taken a bit aback by the touching gesture of the doctor. It made me thoughtful at times. Later I came to know that science is proving that touch has the energy of healing if done with sincerity. The better we are from inside and the sincere is our feeling, the more is the healing power.

No wonder then that babies who suffer from small ailments become healed with their parents’ touch.

Healing activities like Reiki centers around the healing energies of touch. The Child of God, Lord Jesus is believed to have healed the sufferers with his golden touch. With the inner purity and divine state of mind, no wonder he gained that energy which liberated many sufferers and is still considered to be healing by believers.

A word of caution to make your touch most effective is not to fake it. Touch with sincerity only when you feel the need. Touch with grace, prudence and with respect for the other person in mind. This is because people are intelligent by instinct. Even a baby and a most ordinary person can tell the difference between a touch that is sincere and gentle and the one that is egoistic or made with not so good intentions.

Use your prudent touch effectively and with grace to communicate effectively and exude your inner warmth to those around be. Be happy and spread happiness spontaneously. Create the magic around you!

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